Whine of the Month : June 2010

There are a bunch of new members who probably haven't explored the archives yet, so here's an old column that I like a lot…

Jeez Harry, why don't you ever recommend wines that are easy to find? Huh? This is a comment that I have heard a few times and I'd like to take this opportunity to respond. In the first place, I flatly deny the allegation. A lot of the wines on the website are widely available. Jaboulet Parallel 45, Kenwood Vintage Red, Cline Zinfandel, or the Chilean wines from Walnut Crest, for example, can all be found readily at any decent wine shop in America. Secondly, a polite inquiry to your local dealer should result in their being able to find whatever it is that you're looking for, no matter how obscure. Now admittedly, the wines that I get from Trader Joe's Markets will probably not be easily available anywhere else, although for example, the STG Zinfandel "Well's Vineyard", that I've included in this month's list is available nationwide. Thirdly, using the web as I've suggested, is one of the smartest ways to come up with the bottles you're looking for and in this month's column, "Online Wineline", I'll tell you about a couple of great new web resources.

Finally, I want to address what I see as the real problem with easy to find, inexpensive wines. They're crap. Well, not crap exactly, but boring, generic, and totally lacking any specific character. Sort of like sitcoms on "The WB". Although domestic producers have been making non-winery specific "brand name" wines for a long time, it's the Aussies who have elevated brand building to a marketing art form. It started with Lindeman's and Penfold's and Rosemount Estates, who produce pretty decent wines, and whose selections have even graced these pages from time to time. Lately though, it seems like they're going crazy down under. The big "breakthrough" brand is yellow tail, which I've heard people rave about. In the interest of fairness, we tasted their Shiraz, and felt it worthy of inclusion in this month's list. Not a rave, but acceptable, easy to drink, and to buy. Since the yellow tail phenomenon though, the market has been absolutely flooded with Aussie brands with cute names. I actually drank one the other day called "Wombat Gully", and there's also one called "Cockatoo Ridge". Really, I'm not making this up. What's next, Tawny "Frogmouth" Port? (look it up)

Anyway, the upshot of all this is that American companies, sensing an opportunity, have created their own brands of boring wine. These include Amber Hill (Raymond), Turning Leaf (Gallo), Frei Brothers (also Gallo), RanchoZabaco (also Gallo!!) Woodbridge (Mondavi), and Stone Cellars (Beringer), to name just a few. Of course, in most cases, none of these corporate affiliations are to be found anywhere on the labels, in an attempt to make you believe that you are drinking fine wine from a winery that actually exists. Not… As we can clearly see, Gallo is still the 800-pound gorilla in the industry, having produced 60 million cases of wine last year alone! So while the consistency is there, the character is not. How could it be?

Even more ridiculous, is the patently absurd ad campaigns that accompany the marketing of these wines. Aside from the overt implication that true love and everlasting romance can be yours for the price of a bottle of cheap plonk, there's actually a brand of Chardonnay that claims that the grapes are "slow pressed". They're trying to get you to believe that somehow this method extracts more flavor from the fruit, and that the extra time that it takes shows how much they care about bringing you the very best. Let me tell you something Chester, in case you haven't already figured it out, there's no such thing as "slow pressed". It's a completely meaningless term and the nimrod at the agency (or God forbid, the winery), who came up with it should be sent to spend some time in the crusher himself.

Anyway, the point is, go ahead and try some of the popular "supermarket" wines if you want to. Just don't say I didn't warn you.

Harry "The Little Old Winethinker Me" Orlove